A Modest Proposal

Games 53 through 56 - Red Sox

A's 6, Red Sox 3

Red Sox 5, Mariners 3

Mariners 4, Red Sox 3

Mariners 1, Red Sox 0

Record: 32-24

In 1846, after 30 some-odd years of bickering, Britain ceded the Oregon Territory to the U.S. The territory included, among other things, the land that became Washington, which became a state in 1889.

One year later, in 1847, the U.S. Government signed the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo with Mexico, securing territorial rights to California, Arizona, New Mexico, Nevada, Colorado, and Utah.

While it's possible that those territories offer something useful to our great nation, as a Red Sox fan today, I stand before you with a modest proposal: give 'em back. To Britain, all of Washington - Seattleites get socialized medicine and cricket. To Mexico, California's yours, amigos. And most importantly to me and my ilk, the Mariners, A's (and Angels) go join their home country's leagues and stop making me miserable. No more 10:10 pm start times. No more waking up to check the computer to see how the Sox did, only to shake my head ruefully at yet another underperforming loss. And no more underperforming losses, sleepwalking through on Pacific Standard Time. Somnambulant bastards.

I'd even be willing to throw in Arizona. That'd create all kinds of havoc with November's Presidential election, what with one of the candidates now being Mexican, but that's a minor risk I'm willing to take.

Slouching Toward Gomorrah

Games 51 & 52 - Red Sox

A's 8, Red Sox 3
A's 3, Red Sox 0
Record: 31-21

A really smart, if partially intoxicated guy recently wrote of the Red Sox' recent success, "...so I'll enjoy it for now and remember that the Sox have to go to the West Coast where the odds turn quickly."

Honestly, it's sometimes painful to be this smart and prescient (and humble, don't forget humble) at the same time. It's also painful to watch the Sox play on the West Coast. Fortunately, I live on the East Coast, and I'm presently ensconced in my parents' breezy South Carolina home, so I don't actually have to "watch".

Jerry

Game 45 - Mets

Braves 4, Mets 2

Record: 22-23

Sadly, I'll just defer to Jerry's comments in my last post and (swallowing pride) what he said before the season. Over at the Wheelhouse, Jerry ranted -- not as vehemently as he is wont to rant about Sidney Crosby or my hypocrisy, but still -- that the Mets were old, broken-down, and overpaid by dozens of millions. I bright-sided it, blocking out downside with my "upside-only blinders" (available at the Shea concession stand), and now here we are.

Everything we type here seems to get prefaced or appended with caveats, disclaimers, and concessions, and this will be no different. For the record, the Top 5 Phrases Typed at MLC are:

5. "That said"

4. "Considering that"

3. "It's still early"

2. "Lotta ball left"

1. "Keep it clean, TJ"

So we're not chicken littling it here, and there's still every chance, or at least a puncher's chance, that the stars will shine and the old guys will stop limping off the field in the middle of the game with some ridiculous injury that they say will keep them shelved for a couple of days only to be placed on the DL for the second time this season. It's just that Omar's latex paint job on the outside of this purported battleship is starting to wear thin, and beneath it the letters PT are showing through.

It takes more than Albert Einstein Bobblehead Night to smarten Mets fans up, but it's happening. Slowly, perhaps in part via well-thought-out blogs like Metsblog.com, the focus of Mets' fans ire is going from the players to the manager to the general manager who constructed this squad. While nobody's immune -- or faultless -- here, it is meet and right so to do.

Omar Minaya has been answering question about whether Willie Randolph is on the hot seat; he had to know that without a turnaround the day would soon come that the target would change and the question would be directed over his head. Welcome to that day.

That said / considering that, it's still (kind of) early and there's definitely still a lotta ball left. We'll sit back and watch whether the Mets can blow Jerry's (keep it clean, TJ) prognosis out of the water.

Back In the Saddle

Games 48 and 49 - Phillies

Phils 12, los Nacionales 2

Phils 7, Spaz-stros 5

Record: 27 wins, 22 losses

Ryan!

Dude, where you been? Holy sh!t, we were wonderin' what happened to you! Back in February we all flew down to Clearwater. Everyday, we got up, stretched, played about 4 innings and then showered and hit the links by 1:00. Chase always ran home to mama after the 18th hole but Pat and Shane always stuck around the clubhouse to have a beer or six.

Hell, even Uncle Cholly joined us occasionally and would make us tell stories about Larry. He really loved the one about when Larry threw his pitching wedge into the drink after he lost 4 balls on the 13th hole, the one with the dog leg left. Cholly never throws his clubs. He just sips his Beam after ever double bogey and farts for good measure. It usually works. We tell him that if he'd drop about 40 pounds his swing would be sweet but Cholly says beef and gravy was good enough for Pappy and he lived 'til he was 94 on nothin' but filterless Pall Malls, Pabst and beef and gravy.

Anyway, playing golf everyday for 30 days got boring but by then, we were packed and ready to return to Philly. When we got here, Pat and Chase went on a tear until they realized you were missing. Brett's not talking to anyone because he forgot how to breathe through his eyelids and Cole is too busy looking up Pokemon cheat codes in between starts to spend any time with us.

I'll tell ya, when Cole starts, he's been pretty wicked. JC got us all saying that. He pronounces it kinda funny like "wick-it" and it usually precedes adjectives like funny or awesome. He said it's a habit he picked up hanging around those rich kids up in Boston. We told him f**k Boston! Don't bring that Beantown sh*t down here but he said maybe if we act like them, we'll win like them so we figured we'd give it a try. Cholly agreed but said he personally would refrain because it might get back to his pastor back in Byooona Vista and he might think it was devil worship.

Not much else going on around here. Occasionally Jimmie will swap Jamie's cleats with Flash's just for fun. You ought to see those old bastards trying to figure out what's wrong. They slip them on and wiggle their feet and do one of those Python silly walks to see if they can get comfortable before they remember that they wear Nike, not Addidas or vice-versa. When Jimmie's really feeling ornery, he'll replace Jamie's Walkman with his I-Pod just to watch Jamie try to figure it out. Eventually Flash will wonder over with his grandaddy glasses on the tip of his nose to see what the fuss is about. None of us dare messes with their Cialis though. We all agree that Priopism is not funny.

Other than that, the fans have been great. They ask about you all the time but we just tell them your finding your groove somewhere. Someone said you were in Nepal smoking hash with Ricky Williams but we know you're afraid of heights. Glad your back now though because pitchers have figured out that Pat will swing like a Dominican regardless of pitch location and that there really is no reason to pitch to Chase when then next batter in the lineup is an automatic out. I'm not exaggeratin'! The dude batting in your slot all season long struck out 69 times in 45 games! PECO Energy has him doing advertisements on the SEPTA buses and trains.

Well, I think we're gonna start puttin' up a bunch of crooked numbers now that old RyHo is back! Sure missed you buddy.

Your Pal,

The Phanatic

Yippie-kay-yay...

Game 47 - Yankees

Yankees 2, Orioles 1
Record: 22-25

Well, well, well...look what we have here. Six solid from Ian Kennedy, Veras and Farnsworth (wow) throwing heat in the 7th and 8th and Rivera in the 9th (nice vulture win Mo). The game winning hit from the artist formerly known as Robinson Cano. And a fantastic ejection for Joe Girardi (Zapruder footage here) on a very weird call in the 9th that preceded the game winning hit. Sure, the Yanks scored a measly two runs, but they found a way to win, and that's all that matters. The stadium was rocking, and now they get the hapless Mariners over the weekend. Dare I dream of .500? (yes, I know I just jinxed them)

A Gentleman Drunk

Games 48 through 50 - Red Sox

Red Sox 2, Royals 1
Red Sox 6, Royals 3
Red Sox 11, Royals 8
Record: 31-19

Sometimes...I get emotional...when I drink Booker's. And to see you guys putting forth this kind of effort. After I thought...you didn't care. I just...I mean...Whew. I need a minute here.

Red Sox? No, no, no. I'm talking about Whitney, TJ, and Nick. I go away for a few days (to Center City, Philadelphia, PA, USA) and these guys overcome so much to post a few hundred words of moderately entertaining blog content. I don't even have words. You'll never know how much this means to me.

The Sox, meanwhile, just dropped a ho-hum 7-0 homestand that included a no-hitter, a successful return to the bigs by Bartolo Colon, and Justin Masterson's first major league win. It is truly an embarrassment of riches right now for the Olde Towne Team. So, y'know, I got that going for me, too. As Teejay accurately notes (in 10,000 words, even a Yankee fan is bound to hit on something that's true - the whole 100 monkeys in a room for 100 years thing, and all), there's a lotta ball left, so I'll enjoy it for now and remember that the Sox have to go to the West Coast where the odds turn quickly.

Fortunately, I'm embarking on another trip on Saturday, so I can look forward to another flurry of activity around these parts. I'm all aquiver just thinking about it.

Friends

TJ, seems like you're having a tough time with that baseball "team" of yours. My heart goes out to you. No, really.

If you want to talk . . . well, here you go . . .

I'm not dead.

Games 35-46: Yankees

Indians 3, Yankees 0
Yankees 6, Indians 3
Tigers 6, Yankees 5
Yankees 5, Tigers 2
Rays 7, Yankees 1
Rays 2, Yankees 1 (11)
Yankees 2, Rays 1
Rays 5, Yankees 2
Mets 7, Yankees 4
Mets 11, Yankees 2
Orioles 12, Yankees 2
Yankees 8, Orioles 0

Record: 21-25

Man has this post been a long time coming. Whitney even beat me back to this space, which I thought darn near impossible. I gave you the scores and overall record above, so that means I'm all caught up, right? Well, not so fast, I might have a few things to say (sound of people quickly clicking away)...

This post covers 12 games. The Yankees record in those 12 games: 4-8. My BAC during a work conference last week was higher than the team batting average during that same span (they lost to Kenny Rogers and his 6.66 ERA god damn it). The Yanks currently sit dead last in the A.L. East; at 21-25 they are already 7.5 games back of the Red Sox (f u rob). The Red Sox even got a win from Buffet Colon yesterday...unreal. And a no hitter from Jon Lester on Monday. Even that homophobe Julian Tavarez realized what a good thing he has in Boston and accepted an assignment to Triple A Pawtucket. Oh I'm sorry, got off track there, I was led to believe this was a Red Sox blog...

C.M. Wang was undefeated last time I posted - now he's coming off a shellacking from the equally underachieving NY Metropolitans. Billy Wagner calls his Mets teammates out, they have closed door meeting, they beat Yank's skulls in. Willie Randolph plays Race card, then wisely plays Reverse, Skip, and Draw Four Wild cards, and all is well. Except he didn't say Uno. Sorry Willie, the Wilpons need to see you upstairs, stat. And bring your Mad Libs. Oh yeah, did I mention Wang hurt his calf last time out too? Sweet.

Hey, I hear Jason Giambi wears a jungle-themed thong when he's in a slump. Super...thanks for the insight. So what the hell was Jayson Werth wearing the other night when he did his best Hard Hittin' Mark Whiten impersonation? I must say, as a Brett Myers owner in my NL-only league, I am proud to announce weekly that my wife-beater leads the league in home runs allowed (we also have wife beaters Jorge Cantu and Elijah Dukes on our squad...it's like a Law and Order: SVU episode). Keep up the good work Brett, and let's hope that stress ball is helping on the home front.

Am I rambling? So what, I haven't been here in awhile. Just be lucky you didn't get stuck with my Steven Wright or Dennis Miller-themed posts...that would have been excruciating for you (for all 30 seconds you scanned it). The Yankees have been outscored by 20 runs on the year. They are a meek 10-12 at home, an equally mediocre 11-13 on the road. They seem beyond lethargic and disinterested during games. The only juice comes in the 8th and 9th innings with Joba and Mo, and what's that, yep, Hank is going to get his way so now Joba will be in the rotation soon. Speaking of that rotation...

• Kei Igawa, please go cash your absurd paycheck and never be seen again (and take off those fucking sunglasses you stupid asshole). If and when Brian Cashman gets canned, this has to go down as his worst signing ever (yes, even worse than Carla Pavano).
• Mike Mussina, I will give him credit, things were actually going quite well for him (he had won five games in a row)...until that first inning (er, first two outs) last night. And honestly, if someone would make a fucking play in the field that inning never happens. But, those be the breaks, and that is the Moose I feared we would see all year - he tees 'em up, and the opposition peppers the field with his 87 mph "fastball". Let's hope he can at least rebound to "average starter" next time out.
• Andy Pettitte, buddy, pal, we need you to snap out of it, unless of course you are truly d-u-n, in which case I know a certain former teammate who would like to take you out back and put you out of your misery.
• Darrell Rasner is the second-coming...of what I do not know. Aaron Small maybe? Fine by me, someone needs to stay on that mound for 6 innings each night, and he seems capable (so far).
• It sure would be nice if Ian Kennedy would take his head out of his ass and contribute something...just look at Darrell, Ian. You see Darrell out there? You see how he has mediocre shit but manages to stay in the game past the third. Good, good...why don't you give that a shot next time out.
  

Where was I? Nowhere...and boring you fast. If it sounds like I'm just bitching and moaning, well, I sort of am...but this is where the venting is supposed to occur right? (and more frequently than once a week I gather based on rob's hate emails to me) But don't confuse my usual surliness for lack of faith in my ballclub. They've only played 46 (shitty) games so far in 2008...as our diminutive colleague has often said, "lotta ball left". Do they look dead in the water right now? Yep, they sure do. But the first glimpse of hope? I overheard Steve Phillips saying they were done. So we definitely know they are getting back into the race, because what have we all learned about Steve Phillips? (Whit more than most) That he is a steaming pile of excrement with silver hair and a tie. And he is dumb.

And he likes to harass women in the workplace. Drive safe everyone...and see you in July.

The Weakest Link

Game 44 - Mets

Braves 11, Mets 4

Record: 22-22

In other sports, momentum during a game is palpable and obvious, and what happens early in the contest can alter the course of a contest irreovocably at times. Football games feature chunks of unanswered points and game-changing, tone-setting plays in the first ten minutes. Basketball has runs (keep it clean, TJ) in seemingly every quarter, spurts (keep it clean, TJ) of momentum that shape the outcome. But you didn't come here to read about those other sports (or TJ's juvenilia). You came here to read about the thinking man's game.

Baseball's a different animal, to be sure. With a pace much slower and play more methodical and deliberate, setting the tone in the early going with a single event is rarer. Rallies are most often confined 'twixt the 0 and 3 in the OUTS box of a single frame. Beyond the sage wisdom of "momentum's only as good as tomorrow's starting pitcher," it's usually only as good as the next batter.

To put it into a single thought, the notion that one bad play early on could sully and taint (TJ, honestly!) an entire ballgame is improbable. 27 outs for each side over three hours and fourteen minutes should never be decided by one medium-to-slow grounder to second base in the third inning.

But it was. I saw it happen.

Bottom of the third, speedster Mark Teixeira hit a two-out groundball to Luis Castillo, he of the six-two-five salary and the OPS to match. Luis gloved it as the zippy Teixeira flashed down the line. Then he bobbled it a bit and just missed nabbing the lightning-quick Texieira at first. No out recorded, no error recorded, no inning recorded. Three runs later, 3-1 Braves, and there it went.

Over the course of the next six frames, the Mets' game disintegrated like my conversational skills over the last few hours of last Saturday night. And just as the missus indicated that there needs to be some serious changes in my game plan for future consumption, many are starting to wonder what sort of changes to the Mets' game plan -- or game planners -- need to take place.

I consider myself neither a rampant Willie Randolph-basher nor a Willie apologist. And the over-arching questions about how influential a baseball manager is, whether poor play by uber-millionaires is the fault of the guy making the lineup card, and whether the GM's more at fault here still remain. All I know is that it looked for all the world like the fellas in the gray road uni's started packing up their gear in the bottom of the 3rd last night, and that will always, always, always get the natives restless.

Welcome to the crosshairs, Willie. I gotta tell, you though -- your explanations are starting to sound even lamer than mine.

The King of Queens

Games . . . whichever through last night - Mets

[insert mediocre baseball results]

Record: 22-21

Hi there. I'm back from another hiatus at MLC, back in a typically underwhelming fashion. Yikes, I really am mimicking the performance of my team this year. Barely showing up, leaving hardly a mark on things, and slipping back into afterthought status. Good times.

I read the news today, oh boy. Take your pick of recent snippets to keep Mets fans reaching for the Prozac:

• Pedro Martinez mulling retirement after this season to be with ailing father
• Willie Randolph criticizes SNY booth, hints at racism in their critiques of him
• Ryan Church (the best thing about this unimpressive start) suffers concussion
• Mets lose two to Braves, including one to a masterful Tom Glavine
• Mike Piazza announces his retirement

Okay, I'll choose to focus on Piazza retiring today. Because it's not actually bad news -- it's the right call now, and it presents an opportunity to tip a collective cap to a great ballplayer and, by all accounts, a great guy.

"But I have to say that my time with the Mets wouldn't have been the same without the greatest fans in the world. One of the hardest moments of my career was walking off the field at Shea Stadium and saying goodbye. My relationship with you made my time in New York the happiest of my career and for that, I will always be grateful." -- Mike Piazza

I'm rather surprised, pleasantly so, at his singling out the Met years and the NY fans. After all it was LA who gave him his chance, and he had his best statistical years with the Dodgers. Tommy Lasorda made a pitch for Piazza to enter Cooperstown as a Dodger; I don't feel as strongly about Lasorda as Irwin M. Fletcher does, but Tommy, pipe down.

I've said lots about Mike Piazza over the years here; unfortunately, I had to waste way too much MLC space here saying less than complimentary things in '03-'05 as his skills eroded and management bungled where to play him. But I think my recap of his finale as a Met speaks well for my thoughts on the guy.

What can you say that hasn’t already been said about Mike Piazza? The guy has maintained an unparalleled level of humility, understanding, and appreciation for his place since Day 1. To hear him last night in the Yankees-Angels telecast was to understand why denizens of the Township have every right to deify the man. He says the right things with a sincerity foreign to all too many professional ballplayers of any era, let alone the present batch of perspective-deficient self-aggrandizers. The Mets are only 43 years old, but they’ve seen an array of superstars don the colors; with Piazza, though, it goes well beyond the record-setting numbers. With the parabolic arc of Piazza's numbers flattening over the past few years, Mets fans have needed to gravitate to Mike Piazza the guy over Mike Piazza the athlete, but he’s always brought more to the table than the majority of his peers. That “Thunder Road” came on my iTunes shuffle (1 out of 12,016 songs) as I was typing this paragraph is amusingly fitting. Here’s hoping that, like Springsteen, Piazza enjoys a surprising resurgence in the twilight of his career, one that begins next spring. May he continue to be exciting to watch perform, worth the price of admission, and capable of cranking out hits when the masses clamor most for them. (Unless the Yankees sign him; then I hope he’s lousy. Sorry, Mike.)

Anyway, the Mets fans gave Piazza a reception to remember as the season came to a close, and my beloved 2005 Extra Innings Package concluded with a montage of Piazza moments as “These Are Days” by the Empire State’s own 10,000 Maniacs provided the accompaniment. (What, you thought something Piazza-related wouldn’t be a touch cheesy? Come on now.) Like Mike alluded to last night in the booth, the Mets and Mike Piazza in 2006 are plainly two great tastes that don’t go great together, but you just never know what might work out. Though there isn’t a single logical argument to be made for his return to the Mets, I find myself kind of hoping he does. This is reason # 749 why I’m not a big-league GM.

With the state of Mets Township less than chipper (I am definitely not indifferent to Chipper, Nick; can't endure that putz), the news of Mike Piazza hangin' 'em up is a relatively positive thing; it's one more time to take pause and remember an all-timer in Mets lore. We'll do it again five years from now when he gives his HoF speech. And we'll dig it even more if the intertwined letters are an "N" and a "Y" instead of an "L" and an "A."

Yeah, it's sappy, sentimental, and off-topic. You really want me to talk about Willie Randolph insinuating Ron Darling's a racist?

Larry King Live!

Games 43 through 47 - Phillies

Crushed the Jays

Crushed by the Jays

Nipped by the Braves

Stymied by los Nacionales

Edged los Nacionales

Record: 25 wins, 22 losses

• Something tells me that the clock radio in the Bronx is broken. This might well be the year the Yanks sleep in.


• Jason Varitek must know something. Tito better get the transition plan ready.
  


• Can anyone say they are honestly surprised about the state of affairs in Flushing Meadows these days? Honestly.
  


• Time is near for the Cubbies' June swoon followed by Mt. Sweet Lou erupting.
  


• I have always been indifferent to Chipper in Rafael Palmeiro sort of way.
  


• Who does Ryan Howard consult for hitting advice? I mean it.
  


• Does Bob Carpenter have a clue? He actually said without employing any qualifiers or caveats, unequivocally, that Ryan Zimmerman is the best young third baseman in the game. He also stated that the Phillies are having a disappointing season thus far. Alrighty then.
  


• I don’t like their nickname (old or revised.) I don’t like the fact that they are called Tampa Bay (as opposed to Tampa or St. Petersburg.) I certainly dislike their park and I detest their uniforms. However, it’s nice to see that wretched franchise turn it around after 10 years.
  


• The past 3 evenings, my nine year old son has tuned in a ballgame on the radio as I put him to bed. I am starting to suspect he has been abducted by aliens and replaced with a back-to-the-future Beaver Cleaver. It’s either that or he has been secretly reading Ray Kinsella. I will let you know if he requests to “have a catch.”
  


• Remember Whitney?

Baseball Fantastic

Game 47 - Red Sox

Red Sox 7, Royals 0
Record: 28-19

Really, Disney would've rejected this script as too maudlin, and far too fairy tale. Kid makes it to the big leagues. Kid gets cancer. Kid comes back, struggles, then wins Game 4 of the World Series. And then throws a no-hitter the following season. This is why we watch sports.

Since you already know the rest of the story, I give you SoSHer Corsi Combover's reaction, "Wow, if that Francona/Lester embrace doesn't make you well up, nothing will."

It was a mite dusty in my house, too, during that embrace. During his postgame presser, Francona acknowledged viewing Lester like a son, and said, "He's not just a good kid because he threw a no-hitter. He's a good kid because he's a good kid."

Watching that hug and then listening to Francona after the game reminded me of how perfect he is for this Sox team. Secure enough in himself to give the veterans rope and keep them loose, and credible and caring enough as a mentor to lead the kids. He remains perhaps the most unsung contributor to the Sox' success over the last 4 years.

Oh, and if we're counting, that makes the all-time no-hitter scoreboard Sox 18, Mets 0.

Xaipe

Games 44 through 46 - Red Sox

Red Sox 5, Brewers 3
Red Sox 7, Brewers 6
Red Sox 11, Brewers 7
Record: 27-19

I originally started this post as a bunch of notes, intending today to finish up and add my usual clever bon mots. Sadly, this 5 minutes is all the time I'll have today, so what follows is the best I can do. Consider it my e.e. cummings phase.

weird series:

rainout, day is done

matsuzaka

out of trouble all day

a youks error (!) at third (delete !)
long time off and a paps tater (ryan braun, not sucking)

dirty water

5-0 lead in the nightcap (of the odd 3:55, 8:35 twinbill)

for naught, or not?

and joy on the leaden wings of 2 brewer errors
7 gaffes between the 2 teams in game 2

baseball, the beautiful game
timlin perfect 9th for a save

whither the little-used papelbon?

dirty, dirty water

chicks pleased at the longball festival

4x2 over the fences
beckett 2006: an unwanted encore
ellsbury out on the steal. a gasp from the crowd

lugo's brain numbs on the paths (that's not weird. not weird at all.)
bullpen shaky but good enough

dirty, dirty, dirty water

later, friends, we talk of the pen

mediocre is kind

young masterson tuesday

old/new colon wednesday

the rain, it colors everything

Nothing!

Games 36 through 42 - Phillies

Lost to the D-Backs

Beat the Giants

Lost to the Giants

Lost to the Giants

Phils 5, Bravos 4

Bravos 8, Phils 6

Phils 5, Bravos zip

Record: 23 wins, 19 losses

GEORGE: Yeah, but nothing happens on the show. You see, it's just like life. You know, you eat, you go shopping, you read.. You eat, you read, You go shopping.

RUSSELL: You read? You read on the show?

JERRY: Well, I don't know about the reading.. We didn't discuss the reading.

RUSSELL: All right, tell me, tell me about the stories. What kind of stories?

GEORGE: Oh, no. No stories.

RUSSELL: No stories? So, what is it?

GEORGE: (Showing an example) What'd you do today?

RUSSELL: I got up and came to work.

GEORGE: There's a show. That's a show.

RUSSELL: (Confused) How is that a show?

JERRY: Well, uh, maybe something happens on the way to work.

GEORGE: No, no, no. Nothing happens.

JERRY: Well, something happens.

RUSSELL: Well, why am I watching it?

GEORGE: Because it's on TV.

RUSSELL: (Threatening) Not yet.

This morning, Rob asked the MLC citizenry WTF?

Well, Rob, I got nothin'.

You remember my opening post of the season where, in mind numbing detail, I listed the Phils' win totals since 2001? Brutally pedestrian stuff for sure. Made your eyes bleed. Unless of course, you were quick enough to recognize the posting of a litany of numbers and then immediately and instinctively bailed on the entry. (You'd probably do well to just bail whenever you see that lame little logo up there.) Well in that post, I lamented the fact that the Phils are just so. No, not So Taguchi. Their only 4% So. The club is a nice little revenue generator. They attract nice crowds to their Little League dimensioned park with several bona fide super stars and a bevy of journey men and also rans. Very few experts however, think much of the Phils beyond that.

To their credit the Phils do not disappoint. They are well on their way to an 88 win season or about what I predicted and about the level they have played for the past 8 years.

My participation on this blog will be driven by success or failure of my favorite team. It most assuredly will not be driven by a team that simply meets expectations. The Phils thus far are a story about nothing and nothing is what I am posting about today. I hate posting about nothing.

Make sense, Rob?

P.S. I Love You

Game 43 - Red Sox

Orioles 6, Red Sox 3

Record: 24-19

Was it something I did? Things were going so well. You were 15-7. Every day was sunshine, puppy dogs, frolicing on the basepaths and youthful pitchers hurling gems. I even told you I loved you. Now, it's been raining for weeks, your everyday players keep getting hurt and/or playing miserably, the hurlers young and old can't get out of a paper bag, and you blow 3-0 leads in 3 consecutive games After all I've given you, this is how you repay me?

Don't give me that, "But Manny made a funny" crap. You're just trying to change the subject. Okajima's meatball to Payton wiped out all of the happy-go-luck I had yesterday. Typical. You can't even look me in the eyes. It's like I don't even know you.

And still, tomorrow you'll be all, "I'm sorry", and you'll beat the shit out of the Brewers at home, and give me that little pouty hangdog look, and I'll smile in spite of myself and let you back in the house. I really hate you, sometimes, for what you make me do to myself.