Thursday, January 10, 2008

Paid Advertisement (I Wish)

Join the Mets in sunny Port St. Lucie, Florida, on an Amazin' Getaway!!

All packages include:
Your choice of 3, 5, or 7 nights accommodations with optional additional nights available
Game tickets
Air-conditioned, 4-door compact car with unlimited mileage
Meet and Greet with a Mets player or coach
Custom Mets sports merchandise package, including a deluxe travel bag, tee shirt, Mets Spring Training cap and team collector pin
All hotel and rental car taxes included
The following package options are available:
• Airfare between New York and Florida
• Optional nights to extend your stay and rental car upgrades

Just Made Available! The 7-day Amazin' Getaway tribute to the 2007 New York Mets!

  • 6 nights at the posh Port St. Lucie Hilton, and the last night you get to enjoy a "Mets"-emblazoned lean-to in the parking lot of the Motel 6!
  • 6 days rental of a Chrysler Sebring convertible; on the 7th day you will arise to find either a 1981 Dodge Colt hatchback or a semi-refurbished Razor scooter (second wheel not always available)
  • The Custom Mets sports merchandise package you've been promised arrives on the 7th and final day! It includes the Mets Spring Training cap (junior miss sized), the deluxe travel bag(gie), a team collector pin featuring outfielder Herm Winningham as a 1982 Lynchburg Met, and a brand new Mets* all-cotton T-shirt in the size of your choice.
  • * It's actually printed "Mest" on the T-shirt; factory error.
  • Airfare between New York and Florida: flight down is first-class on United Airlines from LaGuardia to Ft. Lauderdale (drinks and chummy conversation served up by lingerie specialist Laetitia Casta); return flight is from Pensacola to Islip Regional Airport in "almost coach" on TWA (enjoy the free tea!)
  • On your final day of this deluxe Mets getaway you get the long-awaited meet-and-greet with a Mets player! Enjoy the keen insight, smooth batting stroke, and comedy stylings of David Newhan!
  • After seeing five convincing wins in the first six days of this amazing package, your last day you are treated to a 13-1 drubbing at the hands of the split-squad Pirates. In the drizzling rain. And unseasonably chilly weather. And the fat guy behind you will dump his chili dog with extra kraut down the back of your new Mest T-shirt.

Sign up today! Like the success of the 2007 Mets, this offer won't last!!

3 comments:

I.M. Forme said...

i called and the price on this package just went up 20%!!

Whitney said...

But of course.

The recent ticket price hike took some serious cojones on somebody's part.

I.M. Forme said...

for sure.
A patented Sterling kick to the balls. Raising prices after a collapse like that is akin to sending a couple of bully boys down to Venezuela to Tonya Harding Endy's hammies. Turn's out Endy's hammies took care of themselves.